Ripples
by Anrheithwyr
Summary: Sirius spends his last Saturday morning at Hogwarts at the banks of the lake, angry at the world.


_**Written for the 'HP Potions Competition' by Black Boxed for the category **__**Grand Pepperup Potion**__** – Write about someone that needs cheering up, or someone who is cheering someone else up. **_

_**Also written for the 'If You Dare Challenge' by Slytherin Cat, using prompt # 2 'vague misery'. **_

_June 17__th__, 1978 _

Sirius picked up a stone off the ground at random, feeling its weight and size, before he tossed the stone into the Great Lake, watching the ripples forming in the once-smooth-as-glass water. He didn't wait for ripples to stop before he picked up another stone, bouncing it in his fingers a few times. _Splash! _It landed a little farther than the first, creating more, somewhat uneven ripples, and he sighed as if the rocks caused him great pain, though his hand already subconsciously searching for the next rock. The young man was sitting under _their _tree, the one they'd all sat under since Second Year, when he and his best mate, James, had won an arm-wrestling match against a couple of Slytherin Fourth Years. Sirius and James-and two other boys, named Remus and Peter-had been sitting under _this _tree ever since.

It was hard to think that, in just a few days, his entire life would change. He was eighteen now, and school was ending on Wednesday, and Sirius' entire Hogwarts career was flashing in front of him. Every prank they'd ever pulled, every essay he'd procrastinated on until the very last moment, every time Lily had rejected James for a date. All of it, just sitting out in front of him, and Sirius still wasn't sure if he'd learned a single thing his entire time here. He couldn't remember any of the lessons from class, or any of the questions from his N.E.W.T.S. Everything seemed to be some big blur, with only a few moments standing out; James inviting him to spend the summer with him, Remus demanding that they _couldn't _become Animagus just for him. Just four more days, and it would all be over.

Sirius could still recall the first time he'd ever met James, a small boy with a shock of black hair and crooked glasses that he seemed determined to lose. Even at eleven, James had been wildly intelligent, but horribly mischievous-the sort you had to keep an extra eye on. Mrs. Potter had described her son as the kid she had to hold hands' with in the store, lest he walk out with all sorts of nonsense in his pocket's that he hadn't come in with. As young boys, Sirius and James had been so close-best mates forever, they promised, swearing off girls or Quidditch or even grades, if it came before their friendship; and, now, James was engaged to Lily Evans, he was considering a position on Puddlemere United, and he was even top of the class. It seemed like James had grown so much in the past seven years, and Sirius was still just the sneaky, disobedient kid he'd been walking onto platform 9 ¾ for the first time.

"Hey," said a quiet voice behind him, and he heard the sounds of skin scraping rocks as someone sat down on his left. Sirius could vaguely make out an outline of red hair framing a pale face, even though he refused to look at her; Lily Evans, the girl who had taken James away from him. Lily and Sirius sat in silence for a few more minutes, he turning a stone over and over in his hands, and Lily admiring the view. After a while, she opened her mouth to speak. "It's nice out, today, isn't it?" she said softly, raising a hand towards the now-still water, and the birds that were taking flight over the lake. "Like even the school doesn't want us to leave on a bad note. It's nice, isn't it?" She leaned back on _their _tree, which was _not _Lily's tree at all.

"What'd you want, Evans?" he said, aware he was being hostile and cold, but not really giving a damn. He and Lily had been moving towards friendship over their last year, as James and Lily fell in love-they had almost been civil to each other the past few months; now, however, Sirius wasn't concerned about being nice, or polite. He was mad-mad at the world, mad at Lily, mad at Hogwarts, mad at James. He just wanted to sit here at the banks of the lake, and stay mad forever. He could tell from the expression on Lily's face that she wanted to talk to him, to comfort and console him, but Sirius didn't want to be comforted. He wanted to continue his existence of vague misery, until he just couldn't handle it anymore.

"You don't have to be rude to me, Sirius," Lily said to him, her green eyes wide as she looked at him. That was one of the many things about Lily that annoyed Sirius; she could speak with so much emotion, yet seem so unaffected. He couldn't tell if she was upset or angry with him, as her eyes were blank and her face expressionless. "I know you're not exactly happy about James and me….not too happy with our engagement and all, but you've got _no _right to be nasty to me, just because you're mad. I only came out to help you get over this; it's the last Saturday of our time at Hogwarts-do you _really _want to spend the entire rest of your time sulking outside, instead of spending it with your closest mates?"

"No," he admitted somewhat bitterly, scowling deeply. Lily smiled wordlessly, getting to her feet, and she held out a hand to him. Sirius shook his head, still mad, and Lily shrugged, taking a few steps away. Sirius sat there in silence, stone in hand, and he thought. He thought about the first time he'd ever helped James ask Lily out, the first time he'd admitted to Lily that he had a crush on Remus, the time that the five of them had gone out for Butterbeers at The Three Broomsticks. He remembered when Lily had helped him through Charms, and he grudgingly returned the favour when she asked for help with Arithmancy. Lily had always been a decent person, even when he was outright rude to him, something he never truly understood. Sirius sighed once again, and got up on his feet, frowning. He tossed the stone behind him, not bothering to see if it made a ripple, and he followed after Lily, who had already stopped, waiting for him at the foot of the path. She smiled, and he shrugged.

"Don't get too used to it, Evans. I don't _love _you, or anything, so calm down." He rolled his eyes, but kept up the path with her, and the two of them walked together in silence, both realising that words weren't really needed anymore. Besides, Sirius wasn't so angry anymore.


End file.
